Posted by: Wagons Ho | November 7, 2011

Moving it

So here’s something you don’t know about me,  I am fluffy. That’s a cute way of saying I’m fat. Fluffy sounds so much nicer though doesn’t it? It brings with it thoughts of puppies and warm blankets. Not the reality which is tight pants and breathing heavy when you see the stairs. Fluffy is so much better. But let’s face it I’m fat. I’ve been “trying” to lose weight for a few years. I’ve said I was trying a million times over the years but I seriously started trying about 3 years ago. And it worked for a while. I did really well for about 6 months and lost around 30 lbs. Then I had an injury and let that be my excuse for slowing down and slowly but surely the weight crept back on.

It took a while to get re-motivated (read over a year) but with the help of some great friends kicking me in the rear I joined Weight Watchers. It took about a month before I started following the plan. And it worked. I lost 25 lbs and was feeling great. Then life came at me. I gave myself a million excuses why it was ok to quit working out, quit following the plan, to eat that huge piece of cake. I slowly started packing on the weight again and here I am, 3 years later, at pretty much the same weight I was when I started “trying”.

I tell myself that at least I’m not at my heaviest, which is something but I’m certainly not where I was even 6mths ago. I’m still attending the Weight Watchers meetings and smiling at the receptionists as they ask me why I think I had a bad week. They don’t think it’s as funny as I do when I say things like “Well not working the plan might be the reason” or “I ate everything I could get my fat little fingers wrapped around.” I’m paying a huge gym for the privilege of carrying around their swipe card but not actually using it. I’m busting out of all my jeans and I’m not sure where to find my mojo.

So where do I go from here? Giving up is not an option. I don’t want to be the fat mom. I don’t want to sit on the sidelines of my life. I want to celebrate my 50th wedding anniversary. I want my kids to see a happy, healthy role model. I want to be healthy. The book I’m reading on how to be happier talks about how very small changes can lead to big changes. I can do very small. So for the month of November my small change will be to move for at least 5 min each day. I will not count simply walking around the house. It will be something intentional that I’ve done to get my blood pumping. I know I can do this. I will do this. One small change will lead to a big one for me. And who knows, maybe it will be another step out of my rut.

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