Posted by: Wagons Ho | January 20, 2012

No adjectives needed

Long before we adopted our boys it would bug me to see news stories that would describe someone’s child as their “adopted son/daughter”.  Now that we are parents it drives me insane. Why must we always label kids who have been adopted? They would never say “their biological son” but think nothing of always adding that a child is adopted. It’s one thing when the parents first announce it but 5, 10, 20 years later do we still really need to point out every time that the child is adopted?

When you constantly refer to someone’s child as adopted, when there’s no reason to add that, it as if you are saying they are somehow less. There’s this implied tone that says “Ohhh, that’s their ADOPTED daughter.” I can say, with almost 100% certainty, the parents never think of their kids that way. Were my sons adopted? Yes. Is that who they are? No.

Don’t get me wrong. I am a proud adoptive mother. I will gladly spend hours talking about the process, the amazing birthparents that brought our sons into the world and more. We openly discuss our son’s adoptions with them and will answer any questions they have as honestly and completely as we can. But I do not, have not, will not ever introduce them as my adopted sons. They are my sons, end of discussion.  From the second we got the call from the adoption agency they were mine, heart and soul. No extra adjectives needed.

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