Posted by: Wagons Ho | March 14, 2012

Loosing it

I’ve decided I need to lose a few things this year.

Guilt about not going to the gym – Since my gym closed last year I have felt a little lost. I joined the mega gym knowing I had a mental block against them. I never did find my stride there. I let every excuse under the sun keep me from going until I was down to once a week. I often skipped even that. I’ve debated quitting for a while but the guilt kept me paying the bill.  I finally decided enough was enough. I will no longer feel guilty about not going. I will no longer feel guilty about the money I’m paying them. I’ve put my membership on hold for a few months and we’ll see where I am then.

Pants that are to tight – Once again I’ve gained back most the weight I lost, but I’m still cramming my big butt into the smaller pants. I told myself I wasn’t allowed to buy bigger jeans once I went down in size but the fact is I need the bigger size again. So I’ll buy a couple of pairs in the bigger size and know that, just because I need a bigger size now,  it doesn’t mean I won’t ever need smaller ones again.

Stressing about my job – This one has been on my list for a while. I let myself get all worked up by the job and a few fellow employees. I need to learn to let it go. To not get all worked up about things I have no control over. I will go to work, do my job, do what I’m told without commenting on it and go home. I will also continue to save all relevant emails to CYA for when the shit hits the fan.

Trying to keep everyone happy – This is an impossible task. I’ve known it for years but putting it into practice isn’t as easy as it would seem. There will always be one person hacked off about something no matter what you say or do. So I’m going to let it go. Them being upset is their issue and I will not take it on as my own.

Over thinking everything – I’ll blame this one on being a Scorpio. We don’t forget anything! Well almost anything. I won’t talk about all the everyday stuff I forget. It’s common for me to rehash fights, conversations, trips, etc. It doesn’t have to be old stuff though. Once my mind starts obsessing about anything it’s hard to shut it down. So my goal for this year will be to let this go too. No more wasting energy on what I could have/should have/would have done. I will do my best not to over think every decision I make, or obsess about what will be happening in the future. I’m certain the beach trip will go well even if I don’t have a menu planned out 3 months in advance.

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Responses

  1. Some of those are tricky, good for you though that you recognize them specifically and are working on them.


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