Posted by: Wagons Ho | May 27, 2016

7 years

When I first started this post it was about hitting 5 months since mom died and how I’m still struggling. Then in my Facebook “On This Day” app I saw a post about mom.

I sat there looking at my post, remembering how close we came to loosing her. My dad had been out of town when she fell ill. She had barely been able to get to a phone to call 911 and wasn’t able to call anyone else. We didn’t even know she was in the hospital until Dad got home a couple days later and called the police because she was missing. When he called the hospital they had taken her to we found out mom was in the ICU and on a ventilator. She had almost died without any of us even knowing she was sick.

That was 7 years ago.  7 years of laughter, fighting, and love. 7 years of birthdays, holidays, vacations, and memories. As I sat there crying I was thankful for the first time in a long time. Thankful for all those extra years. And it reminded me to be thankful for the 5 weeks we had. 5 weeks when I got to spend time with her. 5 weeks to say I love you, to hug her, to take a few more pictures. It reminded me to be thankful for the last 24 hours we had with her. 24 hours when she got to see and hug her grandkids. When we got to say goodbye. We wouldn’t have had any of that 7 years ago.

I still miss her more than I can say. I’m still angry and sad. I still cry all the time. I don’t when, or if, it will get better but for a few minutes each day I’ll try to remember to be thankful for the extra time we did have.

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